The Ultimate Pinoy Fashion

Pinoy fashion is a huge joke. 

We've never had a real "fashion-identity", knowing that we've been bombarded with foreign ideas for almost half a millennium. Nevertheless, we embraced our xenocentric behavior so much, it merged with our desperation to become the nouveau riche and caucasian, shat out an even bigger pile of crap some embrace and have the balls to call it "culture". But just like hurting one's toe by kicking it at a part of some hard, solid object, like let's say, the bed, one would just have to bear with the pain and hope that it'll go away sooner or later.

First up...

Photo from: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/

"OH, d0/\/T \/\/3 l00k kh00l, FaR3, tzchongz?!"

Jejemon Style

These are the trying-hard Filipino gangsters. They are individuals with low IQs who spread around their idiocy on the web by tYpFing LyK diZS jejejeje (typing like this, hehehe), which make other people annoyed. They wear everything that’s loose like loose shirts or baggy pants, which they think is cool to look at and as much as possible they want the attention from the crowd.

Image from the internet

These shorts are so short, you can almost see her uterus!

Pekpek Shorts

I am telling you, this fashion item was practically made for Filipinos--este, Filipinas. It's light, comfortable, revealing and it is practical to wear in those hot, summer days where all you want to do is show off your lean legs while trying not to get dark. No matter who you are and where you come from, you will see them, in whatever way they are worn, you would be always be brought to question the promiscuous denim, a cry of frustation, screaming "Nagshorts ka pa!!!"

Image from the internet

Poppin' your collar high isn't as cool as poppin' your shoulderpads high.

Epic Shoulder-pads

We've all heard of the barong tagalog and baro't saya, and everyone knows about that other dress that has these really fantastic shoulderpads, but what is the name of this "unique" dress?

I present to you the "Mestiza" dress!

The what? The white dress? No, silly, it doesn't have to be white! It just means it's for people with white blood!

  But really, what part of that is even remotely unique to our culture? One would ponder where this mode even came from, us or the Spaniards? What is the use of these shoulderpads being so tall? Is it to hide your face because you didn't want to show yourself or was it to be like a forever shrug for young ladies? Either way, this dress served a great purpose of making one feel superior in a way, not to mention it hides a great deal of arm fat.

So the Ultimate Pinoy Fashion is... 

THE PEKPEK SHORTS

Sorry to the Jejejerks and to our national shoulderpads, but I do not see anyone (in their right minds) who would normally wear something like that on the street on a typical day, on the way to a grocery store, or even make pa-cute in those outfits.

Not to mention, I'd have to applaud its versatility in style. From the rich to the feeling-rich, as long as you've got the legs, you can have the freedom to stut your stuff down the road, around the kanto and even in your own home! 

The few downsides I can see from wearing this is, if you don't have the legs for it, it'll be an eyesore for the rest of us. Not to mention when our bi-polar weather would decide to turn in for the worst, sudden downpour would totally leave us shivering like a sisiw, but who cares? You still look damn hot.